The guidelines don't really promote a hedonistic approach to life. The list of "things to avoid" includes the following:
- Coffee
- Alcohol
- Sugar
- Dairy products
- Salty foods
- Spicy foods
- Raw foods
- Iced beverages
- Nicotine and other stimulants
"This isn't going to be so bad," I told myself. I went out and bought cabbage, broccoli and beets, and sipped room-temperature water while Nick drank the wine I had purchased only two days before deciding to commit to the project of deprivation.
I already knew that most of friends were booze-crazed, but the point was driven home when the daily invitations to "go out for drinks" started pouring in. "I don't need to drink to have fun," I said to myself.
I met a few friends at Joe's Garage during "gay pride" to prove my point. They ordered drink after drink, without a care in the world. "This is great," I thought. I'm totally not going to have to pay a big tab at the end of the night."
But the evening wore on. "What am I doing here?" I started to wonder after a couple hours. My friends seemed to be having fun. But without the task of drinking to distract me, I noticed that my thoughts were getting increasingly existential. "Is this all there is?" I asked myself as a girl in a sequined miniskirt, stripper heels and a clown wig walked by.
Not-drinking-at-bars wasn't working out too well for me, so the next time a friend suggested drinks, I countered with an offer to meet for lunch. We met at an Italian restaurant in the suburbs, near our corporate offices. "Do you want to share the caprese salad?" she asked.
"Um, no..." I said. I explained that I was following some Chinese medicine dietary advice, and that I was probably going to order something really bland that no one would want to share. "Karen" asked why I wouldn't have the salad. "Well, I'm trying to avoid dairy products, and raw foods.."
"You're avoiding raw foods?" she looked at me like I was crazy. Everyone knows raw foods are like the healthiest thing ever! I felt like I'd just told her that I'd joined a cult. "Don't share any more details," I told myself.
Conclusion: When I eat healthier food and avoid alcohol, I feel better physically. But without the cloud-like effects of booze it's so much easier to notice all the horror in the mudane details of daily life. Also, don't try to explain why raw foods are "bad" according to Chinese medicine; it's just not worth the scorn.
4 comments:
My acupuncturist told me the same thing (christ, we are yuppies), and I have been blithely and happily disregarding it. No raw? I just can't really give up salad. Also--she told me, no cold things. Seriously? Without salad and ice cream I don't see much point. Take away the beer as well, dang. You know? Also, I saw your acupuncturist at Mac's Fish and Chips.
Just so you know, "gay pride" . . . should be Gay Pride (no quotes unless you are meaning to seem sarcastic).
Hello "Anonymous" (and I used quotes there, because I feel sarcastic about your unwillingness to reveal your identity), thank you for the unpaid proofreading! I was thinking about asking if you'd be my "second set of eyes" for future entries, but I noticed that you failed to notice the incomplete ellipsis (gotcha!).
Actually, I wouldn't hire Anonymous anyway. There isn't anything officially referred to as 'Gay Pride' in Mpls.(single quotes to distinguish from the double-quote usage discussed here). One could say 'GLBT Pride/Twin Cities', 'Pride Festival', 'Pride Week/Weekend' or simply 'Pride' to be more accurate in that sense. Unless one is talking about actually being proud of gayness in general, in which case one could simply say 'gay pride' without quotes, or '"gay pride"' to be sarcastic about that particular notion, or to convey a sense of fatigue or annoyance towards Pride and all that it entails in practice, or any number of other nuanced meanings.
Since blog-writing style is traditionally more weighted towards linguistic license to allow creative expression of one's opinions or feelings on various topics than towards strict adherence to journalistic style rules (which, frankly, are all but ignored even on nytimes.com these days), what is considered "correct" should really be evaluated in terms of what the writer is trying to express. To that effect, and without knowing for sure what you wanted to express, I'd say you could have used any of the above expressions including the one you did use. Or maybe 'fucking "gay pride"', or something.
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